Top Ten Ways to Attract (and keep) a Geek

 Geeks make the best lovers). But they require special care in order to attract and keep them. To that end, we have compiled the following top ten list. You may notice that we have used the set of male pronouns to describe the geek. Please do not take offense. We know there are plenty of female geeks out there. But since the English language does not have a neuter pronoun that can apply to people (we can’t talk about "it" when referring to a geek), and since it is cumbersome to write (and read) sentences containing "he/she", "him/her", "his/her", we have taken the approach of simply using "he", "him", and "his". The advice is the same whether the geek is represented by a male, a female, or both parties in the couple.

 

The list is in approximate order of importance, with number one being absolutely essential before any of the other items on the list can even have meaning.

 

1.            MAKE THE FIRST MOVE. Why? There are so many reasons. Geeks are shy by nature. They haven’t learned the skills necessary to approach a potential partner. They will appreciate being let off the hook of potentially being embarrassed if they are turned down by the person that they approach. They will actually be flattered that you asked them.

 

2.            Ask him to teach you something, like a game (chess, bridge, World of Warcraft). This could actually be the premise of going out on the first date, although it shouldn’t be the only activity. Suggest that you go for a meal and, after, he can teach it to you.

 

3.            Ask him to tell you what he does in his field of interest (perhaps work, perhaps hobby). Look interested, you don’t even have to understand what he’s saying. In fact, telling him you don’t understand but that it sounds fascinating will turn him on.

 

4.            Go to a geeky convention (Computers or Star Trek type) wearing an "I (heart)Geeks" t-shirt. Go up and talk to someone who looks interesting.

 

5.            Gripe about your computer, especially if it’s Windows based. Chances are he’ll try to convert you to a Mac or Linux environment. What better way to spend a first date than having him install Linux on your computer?

 

6.             Accept the fact that he won’t feel comfortable with your non-geeky friends. For that matter, accept the fact that your non-geeky friends will not be comfortable with him. Plan to have most of your dates involve just the two of you, or you and your mutual geek friends.

 

7.             Accept the fact that having 2 (or 3 or 4) computers and monitors is more important than being able to afford going out to a nice restaurant or show or wearing nice clothes (see 9 below).

 

8.             Do buy him the newest technology (cell phone, PDA, game console) as soon as it comes out – even if it requires spending a lot of money, and/or waiting in long lines at the Apple store.

 

9.             Don’t buy him "cool" clothes. He will feel guilty for not wearing them, and at the same time might feel that it’s easier to break up with you than tell you that he hates them and won’t wear them.

 

10.          Recognize that he’s happiest when he’s "doing his thing". Be supportive and congratulate him when he reaches a new level, whatever form that takes.

 

 

 

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